The time my understanding of body love changed

 In Artist

The most amazing thing has happened tonight. Tonight has been a turning point for my body. As a UK size 16 (considered plus), with a multitude of wobbles that I have been concerned over for years, tonight each body part had an epiphany.

5 weeks ago I began running. I have been using the couch to 5k app on my phone and going with a neighbour or solo with the company of Alanis Morissette and Avril Lavine. Today I have completed a run of 20 minutes solid, travelling a distance of 4k (including warm up walk) without breaking to stop or slowing. To clarify, my pace is about the speed of a grandma snail, but I am pacing and I am moving forward.

When I run my body is purely a tool. It’s a machine and an instrument. My mind is so full of the ache in my legs and the feeling of the tarmac under my feet that I cant, and don’t think about the way my floral leggings are stretched over a mass of wobbling bottom or the way my face looks as my hair is blown about in the wind. When I am running my body is strong. I am proud of it as I will it along to keep moving and pushing on.

So very often, and from such a young age we are taught that our body is all about appearances and that self worth is defined by this. So often now with body positive movements we are told to accept our bodies just as they are. Which, we should. But, we can’t just throw the idea out the window that we can do something to make them feel flippin’ fabulous.

Not only have I started running, for the 9 weeks of the programme I have decided not to my weigh myself. The scales have been put firmly away. I made the conscious decision that this journey was going to be about the strength and endurance of my body. I don’t need to see if I gain a couple of pounds one week, because I don’t need anything to put me off. A massive other benefit has been that from running, my mental health and happiness has never been better, and I can feel my fitness improve further and further, my recovery time getting quicker and quicker.

So to conclude, my point of this blog post is to say to you that your body is a totally wonderful tool. Paint it with makeup and adorn it in sequins to feel good, but don’t forget that it is a powerful and strong machine first and foremost. If I can run, I promise you that you can too. Surely it’s worth giving a go? And, if you hate it, there are a zillion other things you can try.

Body love is a powerful thing, but body love also means loving your body in all of the ways. For me, so far the best way I have found to give my body love is to take it for a run ❤